Monday, July 30, 2012

Say It With Me, Again

Say it slowly, because we didn't get the memo last time.

A plastic bottle made with less plastic is still PLASTIC.

A friend of mine pointed out what Nestle has been up to with their new and improved Poland Spring Eco-Shaped bottles. I guess the bottle is super-crazy thin and the cap is tiny. I don't usually catch this stuff because bottled water is way off my radar. Maybe if I pretend it isn't as prevalent, it won't be? No? Darn.

The new bottles use less materials and therefore fewer resources, and they weight less so they are easier to ship, and less material goes into the waste stream. Good, right? Is it still plastic? Yes. Then, no, not good. I read that the company's machines produce 1200 bottles every... hour? NOPE. MINUTE. Can you conceive of that? Because I cannot wrap my brain around that.

Now, are the good people at Nestle doing this because they care SO much about the environment? Of course not. Less plastic and less materials and less shipping cost while charging the same amount or more for the same amount of product (which they pretty much pump free out of communities that would otherwise be USING that water for, you know, themselves) means a better bottom line for their CEO and shareholders. That CEO, Kim Jeffery, in case you wondered what his name is, would have you believe they are doing some great service by giving people something bottled to drink other than soda. He would have you believe they are superior because their bottles are more eco-friendly than the heavier soda/juice/sports drink counterparts. Look - the only reason they care about the environmental impact is because they can use it as a selling point. Bottom line again. (See how that works?)

Did I mention that they have to have a warning on the label about the caps being a choking hazard for babies and small children? Lovely. If your kid gets your hands on this cap and chokes on it, you have no one to blame but yourself. Seriously. I don't want to see one single lawsuit come up about that. I would actually have to side with the Corporation on that one. And that makes me despondent.

Here is the long and short of it... let us ask, "Is this still a plastic bottle?" Why yes it is.

That is all we need to know. Thank you. Move along, please. Nothing to see here.