Saturday, March 5, 2011

Irony: Using Babies to Sell Plastic?

A good example of irony: using babies to sell a product that is horrifically terribly bad for the environment they get to inherit, and the bodies they have yet to grow into.

I have wanted to say something about this for so long! Luckily for me, this stupid commercial never goes away. Everyone thinks it's so damn cute. It has made the rounds of Facebook so many times, I've lost count. Just when I think it might have gone away, someone posts it again, or I see a bus ad with it. Therefore, I feel within my rights to talk about it. You know the one I'm talking about: the Evian ad with the roller-skating babies. Cute? Creepy? Both? Hilarious? I actually cannot force myself to watch it all the way through. Part of it is of course that I do not find babies cute. Anyone who knows me, knows that about me. Do not hand me a baby. I do not want to hold it. Ever. We've already covered the fact that I have no biological clock. Never had, never wanted, never thought they smelled great, in fact hate the smell of baby powder, find them to be messy and loud and somehow always moist. But I digress. Evian used music entitled, "Think Young". I think the point they are going for (again, not really sure, because I just don't get it, period, anyway) is that their water is so good that you should drink lots of it because it will keep you young. ?? Yes? Is that the point to this?

All I get out of it is: here's the future. Here's who gets to inherit the planet. Here's who has to clean up all the plastic bottles from your stupid bottled water!!!! Here's who has a future with a water supply that is completely compromised and scarce. I know, I know, I think too much, I see insidiousness where there is none, I can't just let go and enjoy, I'm pure evil. Say what you will. If more people thought a little bit beyond OH-CUTE-BABY-hey-something-shiny and actually looked around at consequences, then these adorable little guys and girls would have a chance. Let's follow them through their lives, these little tykes in this video, and see how many of them have cancer by the time they are 20. Harsh? Not hardly enough. I'll stop being harsh when 6-year-olds aren't filling cancer wards. Deal? Deal. Do me a favor, meet me halfway, and next time someone tries to pass this video around again or mentions it, please at least say something like, "Yeah, that's a really ironic commercial." They might ask why. Maybe we can make people think more next time. Maybe?

I bet they're even wearing plastic diapers under there.