How Can Fruit be Bad?

I'll be frank. (Well, that's my dad, actually.) These things confuse me. I think they are delicious, and they're fresh good healthy fruit, right? There can't be anything wrong with that, can there?

I'm talking about Edible Arrangements. A great and novel alternative to sending boring old flowers. Nice! But then, I see all the silly plastic sticks we have to throw away. So, um, good healthy fresh fruit, dozens and dozens of plastic sticks. I'm so torn!!! What to think? Good, but bad. Can the company take the sticks back to re-use them? Is that illegal because of some health code? Would people largely not return them anyway? Why can't they use something else, like bamboo? It's not like the fruit is meant to stay on the skewers for very long. Is there a splinter issue? Is the plastic just plain cheaper? Have they tried other things? Is it a focus group thing?

It's kind of sad how a fun delicious little gift can cause such angst in my life. Pathetic, actually. It doesn't help that I know certain fruit juices can leech chemicals out of the plastic, not that they are on there very long, but still.

It seems like a good idea and a good company, if they would only ditch the plastic sticks. I mean, I could make a helluva green smoothie after receiving one of these, especially if they use kale for accent. And those chocolate-covered bananas? SOOO yummy. But then the guilt of all those sticks. Sure, I can find some good way to re-use them, but what about everyone else out there who doesn't?

I want to give this two brooms' up, but I think it has to get thrown in the cauldron as a fail. What say you? Too harsh? Simmer down? I'd feel better if there was some kind of exchange program. You know, return the sticks, get a discount on your next delivery...

No, I stand by the bad. Fruit good. Fruit on plastic sticks bad. Easy.

Keep Yer Grubby Mitts Outta My Trash

Ah, the garbage ritual on my street. I've touched on it before. The dance of the trucks... it's quite magical, actually. Watching the ebb and flow and organization of it all...

Were we thinner then?

My street is lined with fairly sizable apartment complexes. Each building has two or more giant dumpster bins. We all have gated garages; the garbage trucks of course do not go in there. The bins have to come out. That's where this almost-insect-like ballet of cooperation begins. First, the Little Red Trucks come around. They zip into the gated garages and bring out the bins to leave them there on the street for the Big Trucks. BUT WAIT! Before the Big Trucks can come lumbering down the street... here are the Little White Trucks. What are these? These are trucks with little men in them who park their trucks and jump right into the dumpsters to go through them to salvage anything that might be worth anything.

I LOVE these guys. The back of their trucks are full of trash/treasure. Others look down on them and think it's disgusting that they do this; I admire them. I'll say it (cuz it's my blog, after all), they are of a majority Mexican. You know, because we sure couldn't expect "real" Americans to get all dirty like that, right? Gross. Climbing in a dumpster? Should be ashamed. Nope, I think they are awesome. They are pulling stuff out of there that would likely end up in the landfills, and they are DOING something with it. Reselling it for scrap... it will be recycled/re-used/re-purposed. Energy will be saved. Resources will be saved. I love these guys. Finally the Big Trucks come by, and the ritual is concluded for our street.

Which brings to mind an anecdote... we were wandering a lovely farmers' market on Sunday, and they had helpful nice local policemen there to answer community questions. Nice community close to the ocean... nice people. Over comes this nice resident of the nice community to talk to the nice police. He looked fit and ready to spend the afternoon yachting. He wanted to know why the police wouldn't do anything about the homeless people who went through his recycling bins after he put them out to his curb for collection the next day. Those darn homeless people had the nerve, nay, audacity to rummage through HIS good garbage. That was HIS garbage and he paid GOOD MONEY for that garbage collection. He pays his taxes, darn it. He shouldn't have to tolerate some unworthy person sucking off the teat of society using his good garbage to make a tiny bit of money.

I really wanted to say something. And I think the cops were trying their best to be respectful to Mr. Tax Payer, too, but they sure seemed to want to point something obvious out to him. I don't know. Why should this encounter have bothered me so, stuck with me so? Why was I irritated? I LIKE that there are people who go through the recycling bins, you know why? Because then I am really sure that stuff will GET to a recycling center. And the CRV is going to (somewhat) good use. You know what, Yacht Guy, Mr. Tax Payer? Why don't YOU care as much about your recycling as those less-than-desirables in society? That guy and also that lady that goes up my favorite hiking spot to pull bottles out of the garbage cans up there? Hell, they're getting a work-out AND doing good by the Earth. GOOD for them. You've thrown it away, why do you care what happens to it now? And would YOU climb in that dumpster? No: you've already thrown that item away and missed it's value that someone else recognizes. Leave them alone. No - admire them. They earn it.

I salute you, O Dancers of the Dumpsters. And I thank you. Moreover, I really, really respect you. Does that mean anyting to you?

Meh. Prob'ly not. Oh well.

Better Than An Apple

Here I go again. Trashing an otherwise perfectly respectable, pretty much good-for-you product. What is WITH me?

I recently attended the Natural Products Expo. It is a super cool event, filled (really filled, that event is HUGE!) with so much natural stuff one hardly knows where to turn. However, from the first second hitting the floor, I had to remind myself this was a "natural products" gig and NOT a green event, per se. The two ought to go hand in hand, yes I agree, but this is not the case. And that's that... you can't quite call it greenwashing here... Oh I wanted to... but you can't quite.

Case in point: the first display I saw. VitaTops. Apparently these things are great for losing weight and are wonderfully healthy and oh so delicious. Everyone loves them, they have all kinds of seals of approval... GREAT. Super. Wonderful. What stopped me dead in my tracks was this huge sign on their display that said, "Better than an apple!" Dead serious. My immediate reaction was, "In what world??? Plasticland???" While these delicious little morsels are the perfect size and calorie count, they are all perfectly wrapped in individual perfect plastic pouches. Yes, that IS much better than an apple. Not. What's the dead giveaway? What's the phrase that jumps out in a warning? The very first thing they say under the VitaTop's product page is: "VitaTops. Deliciously Convenient."

"No time for your vitamin-fortified cereal this morning? Tired of chewing yet another nutritional bar, but still want your vitamins and minerals and 4-9g fiber with very little fat?" Really? This is what we've come to? Yeah, I know, I'm not really surprised either. (Nutritional bars are hard to chew??) How lazy are we. No, that is not a question. I know we are. Chewing is hard work. So is exercise and eating right. Hard hard work. Convenience is definitely the key to losing weight.

So, anyway, this is a good and quality product. I'm sure it is. I'm totally overreacting. Come on. Is there no other way to package it? None? No? Then it has to go in the "reject" pile. Because this is not cool. You cannot recycle these wrappers. They just end up in the ocean. And why? What for? Because eating right is just too plain hard and inconvenient, and we are all too fat and have to lose weight, and damn the consequences to our children's children?

That's what I thought.