I can see the point, but....

... mini margaritas do NOT need to be in plastic bottles.

On top of it all, these are ridiculously tiny. So you drink a lot of them in your quest to get shitfaced.

And so of course it's safer to have plastic instead of glass because by the time you have had 15 of these, they start falling to the ground. If they were glass, they would break. So naturally you need plastic.

These are one of those things that if I ever see anyone drinking them, it will be hard for me to resist slapping the damn thing out of their hand.

Every other fun froofy beverage has the self-respect to come in a glass bottle. Why oh why the plastic here? Because they are better for tailgating? There is NO REASON for this.

People who bring these to your home, picnic, or event need to be sent away immediately. People who buy these for their home enjoyment need to be stopped from adding to the gene pool. Immediately.

Tell me that after a 4-pack of theses, that the said consumer is interested in making sure the bottles are going into the recycling.

"But what am I supposed to drink at places where I can't bring glass bottles?"

You. You who just said that. Out of the gene pool. We don't need you. And take your red Solo cup with you. I can just see that, too - this little bottle suddenly isn't cold enough, so they pour it FROM this plastic into one of those horrors. At that point, I really do just give up.

Or you can, you know, MAKE your own drinks.

My favorite holiday tradition... thumbing through the Bed Bath & Beyond mailer. After my head flew off at the old-timey Atari Flashback Game Console, with my inner child screaming how we HAD to HAVE that, I was able to look at the rest of the stuff. (But yeah. Oh yeah. Might have to get that. I'm only human. And a product of the late-70's-early-80's. I'm weak.)

But get to the section of "What more can I possibly spend money on that I really don't need?" That's where it gets good. Around the super-special wine openers and battery-operated wine preservers (Who are these people that leave opened wine around that long??? Just drink it!!) was the creme-de-la-creme of the perfect home wet-bar: the Margaritaville Mixed Drink Maker. If Jimmy Buffett is involved in this thing, I am truly embarrassed for him.

For a mere $299.99, you too can own this giant plastic monstrosity that you will use maybe twice a year and that takes up what looks like a go-awful amount of counter space, and of course don't forget to clean it out after use because if you put it away with the liquids in it they will go bad and get really gross... Oh yeah I am running out to get mine! Hope they don't sell out!

Oh, and then when you go to their site to check it out, on the FAQs they recommend using 16oz plastic party cups. Oh, and of course it uses power, so there ya go.

To summarize: giant plastic parts that when they break or you are sick of this just go into Ever-Ever Land (since, you know, plastic NEVER goes away, so it stays around for Ever), energy consumption required, and the potential for great amounts of wasted beverage. This, versus a coupla bottles of alcohol and mix, and then actually pouring drinks by hand. So pedestrian. So last century.
pouring drinks. Snort. The thought of it.

That's it. Just a tiny bit of holiday "extravagance" which is really just plain old stupidity. Surely there are more worthy things to blow this much money on, right? No? Surely.

I Scream for Ice Cream...

I discovered the reason I stay off Pinterest. I'm sure there are a million wonderful things on there, but knowing me, they would be overshadowed by things that piss me off. Like this...

"what a great idea! such a time saver for birthday parties- scoop the ice cream into lined cupcake pans & put them in the freezer. then just pull them out when you cut the cake & serve!"

And someone's comment: "oh I LOVE this idea....no more expensive single servings needing to be bought!!"

Where to start. I almost do not know. I guess I'm wondering why it's OK to create more garbage for a little time saved. I'm wondering what lessons we teach children by these actions. I'm wondering why no one stops to think about the resources wasted by manufacturing these little paper liners in the first place, not to mention the resources to get them to stores, etc.

Most of all, I am wondering who the hell buys "expensive single servings" for a birthday party???

I consider this a Lazy Fail, and the wasteful use of resources for something that isn't really necessary. I know, I know, the hardship of actually scooping ice cream during a party is truly heartbreaking. But I think we can get over it.

You just KNOW these went straight onto paper plates, too. Better yet - Styrofoam. With Red Solo plastic cups and plastic forks. And spoons. And knives. You just know. You know you know. I know. I'm dead sure of it. Add the little plastic crap party favors Made in China and the scads of wrapping paper - OH! and probably bottled water, too, I am sure, because if you are too damn busy to SCOOP ice cream DURING the party, then you sure as hell are the kind of household that uses bottled water - add all that up and you have the PERFECT 21st Century Kids' Birthday Party.

You enjoy that. I'm sure they will when they are adults with their own kids, looking around at what we have left them. Enjoy.

Don't Drink Oil

It's a cute video in support of "plastic" made from corn... check it out in preparation to read, if you will. It's short!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4FzYcW3Fdhs&feature=youtu.be

Red Solo Evil

I have a problem with this, though. Oh, don't get me STARTED on Red Solo Cups and the accompanying stupid song that was written in praise of drunkards and plastic... but let's talk about cups made from corn. Or sugar. Or potato starch. Forks and spoons and plates and even these clear cups for our beverages. These things are great, right?

Well....

Compostables are coming along, but it's not quite right yet. I feel like unless we can replace every single piece of plastic picnic-ware etc with compostables all at once, like, tomorrow, then we have problems. One, these things require high-heat composting. You can't just toss these things in your bin out back. Not all communities have that. YET. These thing will come. But as of now...

How many people do you know that pay attention to where they are throwing what out? Are you at a gathering where you can announce, hey, these cups have to go into a special bin! Hell, you can't even get people to recycle regularly most times! I can't count the times I go down to our trash bin which has the blue recycle bins (3 of them) RIGHT next to it and there is recycle stuff in the trash. With that, we expect people to know they need to put this here special cup in a special place? See, just one of these will ruin a regular batch of recycling. And don't think recycling centers have the manpower or ability to go through every single piece of trash that comes their way. (Americans don't want THAT kind of job. Ew. Yucky. We're above that kind of labor, dontcha know. We need jobs, but not THOSE jobs. Eww.) So, these things are actually dangerous to the system as we have it now. It's not good. I sure don't trust people's knowledge enough. Do you?

Also, making these things out of, say, corn, encourages mono-cropping and GMOs. This is not good. Is it worse than the oil it takes to make plastic?? I don't know. No? No. I don't know. It's a BIG topic. Yes, I think they are better, but no, I am not sure we are ready for them. We have to get there. We aren't there yet.  And I know mono-cropping and Monsanto are right up there with Big Oil. This is not simple. My brain is in a twist just typing this.

You know what I do know? The best way would be to not use any of these things at all anymore. just stop. We lived without them quite well and easily before. Did we not have parties and picnics before Red Solo? Did we suffer? Oh, but Good, glass breaks. Kids can't use glass. It's too dangerous. We HAVE to use plastic! You don't want our kids to get hurt, do you? What kind of person are you?? We can't live without plastic anymore!

Sigh.

Never mind. We're already lost. Forget I said anything.