Now They're Just Trying to Piss Me Off

It seriously is like we're not even trying anymore. Unless the trying that we are doing is the trying to make my head explode. It's as if we have no problem whatsoever with plastic on this planet. None. Like we aren't saying anything over here about the 5 Gyres, like Dr. Marcus Eriksen isn't out there beating a drum about it. (Don't know him? Here: http://www.marcuseriksen.com/ ) It's as if we've given up completely and just announced we'll go ahead and trash the planet instead of trying to move to being better stewards of this Earth, because there is really no going back.

What now, GGW? you say with a sigh. Just this:

I almost have nothing more to say. Almost. It's from our good friends over there at Nestle, of course. Because you know how much they care about the environment. Darn it, I can't even eat one of my favorite candy bars anymore because it's made by Them. But I digress.

3 fluid ounces so as to be attractive to frequent flyers, I suppose. Easy to just toss in your purse or laptop bag. Convenient.

Look, I don't care that you are tossing it in the recycling bin. That means nothing. Nothing. The water of this planet is filled with plastic. Islands where man has never set foot are found to be covered with plastic. Birds who live their lives at sea are found with stomachs full of plastic. When is it enough? When do we get a clue? When do we get the hint? When do we stop?

Obviously  not anytime soon, because every day all I see are more new stupid products like this one coming out for purchase. We do not need these things. We need a healthy environment. The two are not compatible.

Just. Stop.

Or, Make Your Own Damn Salad

I feel like I started out this way before....

Oh, targeted commercials. How you slay me. I have a secret addiction show I watch that I'll talk about more soon - the commercials are priceless!!! Here's a good one...

Lean Cuisine Salad Additions! "Take your lettuce from drab to fab!" And of course they recommend packaged "lettuce". Probably also by Nestle. I knew I wasn't gonna be too happy about these the moment I saw the commercial. The first time. They played it enough during my secret-shame-show that it really stuck in my head.

Find it in the frozen foods aisle. Guessing you need a microwave around for the chicken etc part. If you count the packaged roughage, you got a cool 4 plastic bags for your lunch.You might even top it off by using a plastic fork. Hey, why not? May as well go balls out, you know?

Holy crap, the ingredients list on this stuff is... long. Preservatives and added sugar. Yum. You could, um, of course, MAKE your own stuff, pack it in little bowls, and have THAT for lunch. If you're at home with this.... well, you are probably way beyond my help and any hope anyway, so I pretty much have nothing to say to you at this point in time except your kids and their kids will pay piper, mine won't.

Nestle hasn't priced these very high, and with a sale and a coupon, people can really stock up. Clever, clever Nestle. AND you got them buying Fresh Express lettuce products, too. You know, while you're at it, why WASH lettuce when you can just buy it already cut up and stuff? That's so inconvenient. OH - here's a good one... since you don't want to bring that entire plastic bag to work, bring just part of it in a Ziplock, thereby increasing your plastic track up to FIVE bags!

You know, it's possible to GET this STUFF yourSELF and put a salad TOGETHER for lunch that doesn't involve so much PLASTIC. I know, I know, that takes so much TIME. This is so much EASIER. Screw the future, who cares, we're too busy to be concerned by such little insignificant things.

Say It With Me, Again

Say it slowly, because we didn't get the memo last time.

A plastic bottle made with less plastic is still PLASTIC.

A friend of mine pointed out what Nestle has been up to with their new and improved Poland Spring Eco-Shaped bottles. I guess the bottle is super-crazy thin and the cap is tiny. I don't usually catch this stuff because bottled water is way off my radar. Maybe if I pretend it isn't as prevalent, it won't be? No? Darn.

The new bottles use less materials and therefore fewer resources, and they weight less so they are easier to ship, and less material goes into the waste stream. Good, right? Is it still plastic? Yes. Then, no, not good. I read that the company's machines produce 1200 bottles every... hour? NOPE. MINUTE. Can you conceive of that? Because I cannot wrap my brain around that.

Now, are the good people at Nestle doing this because they care SO much about the environment? Of course not. Less plastic and less materials and less shipping cost while charging the same amount or more for the same amount of product (which they pretty much pump free out of communities that would otherwise be USING that water for, you know, themselves) means a better bottom line for their CEO and shareholders. That CEO, Kim Jeffery, in case you wondered what his name is, would have you believe they are doing some great service by giving people something bottled to drink other than soda. He would have you believe they are superior because their bottles are more eco-friendly than the heavier soda/juice/sports drink counterparts. Look - the only reason they care about the environmental impact is because they can use it as a selling point. Bottom line again. (See how that works?)

Did I mention that they have to have a warning on the label about the caps being a choking hazard for babies and small children? Lovely. If your kid gets your hands on this cap and chokes on it, you have no one to blame but yourself. Seriously. I don't want to see one single lawsuit come up about that. I would actually have to side with the Corporation on that one. And that makes me despondent.

Here is the long and short of it... let us ask, "Is this still a plastic bottle?" Why yes it is.

That is all we need to know. Thank you. Move along, please. Nothing to see here.

Going to the Dogs

Sunday paper coupons are a great source of my product-consternation. This week, I came across a new great healthy product... for dogs. I don't have a dog, I have a cat, and she can be darn picky with her food. She's small and doesn't eat much, so I have to be careful that her food doesn't get stale before she can finish the bag.

No such fears for your dog! Beneful to the rescue! (Oh look, and I didn't even realize it was a Nestle company when I started this! Brilliant!!!! Yes, Nestle, the Big Bad, owns Purina now.) Beneful introduces IncrediBites, real wholesome ingredients packaged in stay-fresh pouches. Yes, you can now buy a box of dried dog food, full of 14 smaller PLASTIC 6-ounce pouches of convenience.

IS it convenient? Perhaps. Is it necessary? Not at all. I have never but never heard a dog complain that his food was going stale. I have never heard a dog lament that his food wasn't out-of-the-bag fresh. I HAVE seem dogs eat cat poo right out of the litter box. (well, I guess that IS an argument for freshness...)  I have seen dog food kept in big old cans with a scoop in it, and the dog happily wolf down whatever. This leads me to wonder who this new packaging is for? It isn't for the dog; of that, I am certain. It has to be for the owners who think that their dog is really a little person and needs to be treated as such. (It is not.) I might be lenient if there weren't a slew of other ways to keep the dog food fresh, were a person so inclined as to believe their dog needs hermetically sealed freshness (it does not). You can buy containers anywhere that will keep the food fresh after you have opened the bag. Heck, I think I saw one lisenced by The Dog Whisperer in Petco (where the pets go) the other day. Get one of those, but by all means, REJECT this wasteful plastic.

Beneful's catch-phrase is "Healthful. Flavorful. Beneful. (R)" I ask, "Healthful for whom?" Because these plastic pouches are NOT healthful for the planet. Reject this latest attempt at a grab of a market share. Don't buy this food, buy some other food for your pooch, and put it in another container to keep it fresh... as fresh as that litter-box treat your dog was eyeing earlier.